The days before
I went to the weekend at the Pitch Club. A two day event held by Rebecca Cafiero, an incredibly heart led human who is one of my business mentors. As I headed into the weekend, I felt anxiety. I was in my head. Making up all kinds of excuses about why I didn’t need to go to this event anymore. I was too tired. Felt disconnected from my business. Worried about being drained from social interactions as I have been in the past. There are always a million reasons you tell yourself why you should not do the thing that will move you forward.
A month ago I made a pivot from running my home organizing business to starting a full time clinical position. These are two of my biggest purposes in life- cultivating sanctuaries and mental health. And for whatever untrue reason, I often feel like I need to choose between them. So for the past month my energy and intentions have been focused on this new clinical job. Reminding myself, this is a new season. You are not going to have space for everything. You are choosing to make space for THIS transition in your life. THIS season. To focus on something other than your business. And THAT IS OKAY. I put this in all caps because this is how it sounds in my head. As if I am forcefully but nicely yelling at myself.
Tana Newberry. Emily Huynh. Abby Young.
Arriving at the Weekend
Spoiler alert, I made it to the event. I shifted all of these thoughts one by one- You will meet friends who you have been chatting online with for months (I am in an online business collective with a lot of the women going). You are going to hear from speakers who will share their wisdom (and yes they did!). You will meet new people who will move you forward in growth and vice versa.
I entered the room with dreadful ease. Is that even a thing? Maybe a better way to describe it is social anxiety but I don’t really think of myself getting that (even though I do, ha). It’s like when you are afraid to fully be yourself around humans you don’t know. Asking yourself the questions of what you will share and how you will come across. When we let that melt away, things are easier. That’s just a fact.
Some of my first interactions were embracing hugs. Hugs where you feel the other person’s essence (How do I say that in a non creepy way? There is no way to do it…). Gently wandering around the room in awe of the beautifully placed flowers, the curated intimate setting, ALL of the pink!
The start of the magic
Shortly after we were asked to take our seats. To move forward closer to the stage to connect on an even deeper level. The first shifts, already happening. Throughout the next two days, women would share their vision. The gems of what they have learned. Whether that is money, time management, commitment, PR, you name it.
Imagine being in a room where each person is owning their magic. Sharing the gifts they feel most passionate about and their mission is to move forward in the world with purpose. The funny thing is my ego kept getting in the way. I would hear it say how the chairs were uncomfortable or oh I already know what she’s saying. But then quickly after, my heart and soul would soften the conversation.
When you are consuming that much information from one speaker after another, it takes time to integrate. You are only processing a fraction of what you are hearing. But what you do, will stick. At least it does with me. Coming into a space where you can put your ego aside. Telling yourself that even if you do know something, you are hearing it in a new way. You are listening to it from a different time and space in your life. Where you will gain a fresh perspective.
The cultivated energy of everyone putting their intentions out at the same time, is SO potent. There was a point in the weekend where we experienced a breathwork and sound bath from Rebecca Cafiero and Samantha Harper. Each of the hundred women lay in their own space yet collectively together. Going through their own journey. Envisioning through images, sounds, downloads. This is the power that is created at events. Community. When each person can be themselves so as a whole, there is acceptance. We thrive.
Ati Grinspun led us through another visualization of stepping into our ring of power. Embracing feelings of confidence, alignment, and power. We re-envisioned three moments where we felt this fully in our bodies then claimed that for ourselves. And that is where it hit me. Each of these three moments were felt in collective spaces. Confidence while speaking about designing a peaceful work space at Maya Moon women’s collective. Alignment through my reiki attunement. Power in a womb healing circle.
When you go to these events, you are no longer alone. You are being held. You are gaining inspiration. Maybe you are getting activated or feeling uncomfortable, but it is something you need to move through. Each person gains something unique. And we come together to share that. Even if it is just by being in the same room.
I walked away from this weekend feeling like I had space for myself again. Because I took a moment to be. To re-invest in my dreams. Events like this one, give you the time to process. To reflect, to imagine, to accept, to grow. So each person leaves the space a different human. Making waves of their own. And THAT is a powerful thing.